It’s hard to be misunderstood, underestimated, asked to fit in a box that doesn’t come naturally. Parenting gifted kids is hard. The superhero baby may be a bit of a stretch, but not much. These kids have amazing capacities to learn, analyze, and create, but they can’t do so in a vacuum.
Lately, my kids have really been enjoying intricate coloring patterns with a nice set of colored pencils (thanks, Grandma!).
As they’ve been contentedly creating, I started thinking back to all my concerns about J, who is now 8, because he wasn’t meeting the coloring milestones when he was younger the way I thought he should.
It’s not about who was first, or better, or more precise. Twins are individuals whose accomplishments and struggles stand on their own, regardless of what a sibling has or has not done.
Our kids will come alive as they have never before when they finally find their niche, finally find people who are on the same wavelength, with similar interests, who respond to conversation with conversation rather than the “you’re so smart” excuse of a response. People who inspire and motivate rather than constrain and frustrate.
Some people can accept quirky, can accept differing preferences, but there’s one thing that flummoxes most people: If it’s easy for them, it should be easy for you. They have a very hard time understanding why you’re struggling.
We live in a hyper-connected world where people’s tragedies and struggles go viral, where we can be reached anytime, anywhere – by strangers as well as friends. While being informed and aware is a good thing, I fear that we are unwittingly hurting the mental health of our kids and young people – not to mention ourselves. We weren’t made for this.